Thought Wire – March 10th, 2021

There is a certain moment that replays in my head randomly, without recall or question. This moment isn’t all that impactful–it doesn’t seem important by any measure of what substantial moments tend to look like. My car keys slam into my face, their sharp edges glancing my TV-illuminated cheek. There are several of us sitting around the front room, half stunned at what just happened, half-intrigued still by what’s playing out across the television screen. Loud words that I can’t remember exactly, something to the tune of, “Well, I’m not f****** hanging out with her ever again. What a tease.” Tsh! My car keys shoot from his hand, slapping against my face. There are certain stimulus inputs that when implemented, trigger intense emotional reactions–just like baking powder and vinegar in the popular elementary school volcano science project. Why are my keys hitting my face? The vinegar and powder mix, immediately burning hot–anger and frustration, disrespect–at this point the pain from keys divebombing my face is negligible, unnoticed as my attention turns to the thrower. I swear up and down to not give those keys freely again, I retaliate with words of my own, defending some girl I’ve never met and her choice not to give herself fully to the thrower that night. Part of me is steeply stunned, amazed that sexual desire–unknown, blinded, pointless, emotionless, directionless sexual desire–can make you forget that the only reason you went on that second date in the first place was because you asked to borrow my car keys.

I gained a different, and yet fruitful, understanding of the word ‘temporal’ yesterday. It can be crucial to perceive everything in the world around you in a temporal sense–how do things interact with and relate to time?

Expression is a fundamental building block of the human mind. Similarly in how Socrates said, “The unexamined life isn’t worth living,” and once again stated by Christopher McCandless, “Happiness is only real when shared.” The experiences of life build up, simultaneously in a vat of the conscious and subconscious mind. Sifting through this mixture alone is difficult, because there is nothing to draw it up against, no peer review to divide out the meaningful from the meaningless. While it’s fully possible to make a substantial dent while going it alone, there will always be a missing ingredient–a critical piece to garnish the meal of mortal existence.

The virtual revolution will be drawn out over decades–encouraging the young to teach the old is pivotal in the success of it’s implementation. Now, if you can teach the young to have a positive attitude throughout the process? There is a true accomplishment.

The process of deduction is grueling and painful, under most circumstances. Unless you are measuring something that reacts instantly, the sheer mental capacity to adhere to all conditions of the experiment, only changing the one select behavior–it’s a challenge in and of itself just to pick out which behavior to change in the first place. Which behavior could be the cause of the symptom? Let’s place this in context. I’m in the process of healing a herniated disc in my lower back, so careful consideration over my daily physical activity is extremely important. One small unthoughtful bend, one accidental twist, and the next day might be a bit more sore and painful than the last. The result is an intricate dance with behavioral elimination–slicing out certain potentially pain-causing actions in order to see if a difference is felt. No change must mean the action is in the clear–better yet, the action might be one that helps. But this whole process is not so small or simple as it may seem, it takes days, months, sometimes even years to find the right augments–and even still, they may need further augmentation down the road.

A singing bird never hears another’s song.

I like to imagine that the orange juice that lawyer just pounded after giving her 10-minute counter-argument to the Court is actually a Screwdriver–little vodka, little O.J. Just the way she took a gulp of air after downing the remaining liquid, it just seems to fit. Pair that with a spicy delivery of each defense point and maybe it’s just the midday lull, but that’s hilarious.

The value mentally handicapped individuals add to the world is far more immense than possible to be perceived. Just as the old adage goes of ‘paying it forward’, positive impact has a gracious way of spreading exponentially–therein lies the goodness of mankind. Our interactions with children, babies, mentally handicapped individuals–experiences that return us to our pure, primordial selves–all build character, balance out the ego, and break down the lemons that life hands you. This feels like inarguable truth.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s